Honest Trailers: The Lion King II: Simba's Pride
by Epicheart
Summary: Prepare... for the sequel to Disney's most critically acclaimed film, that won two Academy Awards, and won the hearts of millions. That went straight to VHS.


**I thought that I should upload something, since I haven't been very active in a while. I said that I would do an "Honest Trailer" for **_**The Lion King II: Simba's Pride**_**, so here it is.  
If you haven't had a chance to see the real Honest Trailer for **_**The Lion King**_** on YouTube, please check it out. My **_**Lion King**_** Honest Trailer FanFic came out before ScreenJunkies released their version, so perhaps you can spot some similarities between our two Honest Trailers.  
Maybe I should collab with them.  
Enjoy!**

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Prepare… for the sequel to Disney's most critically acclaimed film, that won two Academy Awards, and won the hearts of millions. That went straight to VHS.

The Lion King II: Simba's Pride

Return to a slightly worse drawn rendition of Africa, with all of the original voice actors from the first _Lion King_ film.  
_Except for the bird, the hyenas, Simba's mom, and Simba's uncle._

(…)

…And experience the sequel to Walt Disney's masterpiece; that teaches kids that it's okay to disobey your parents, and run away from home, as long as you do it for love.

And rips off Romeo and Juliet so hard, it will leave you wondering, why William Shakespeare himself just doesn't crawl out of his grave and sue Walt Disney's pants off already.

Meet Kiara: a whiny, disobedient princess, who thinks that she knows what's best for her and the entire pride, better than her own father.

Meet Kovu: a misunderstood, baby-faced, baby-voiced kid that has a relationship to Scar so overly complex, you can actually feel Disney's spine beginning to break from bending over backwards—NOT to make them cousins.

(_"He wasn't my father, but he was still a part of me."_)

Together, this cartoon Romeo and Juliet will prove that their love is stronger than their family's hate… by not doing all of the things in Romeo and Juliet that Disney left out. LIKE…

Faking your own death by taking sleeping pills… writing a letter to your loved one that tells them not to freak out when they hear the news that you're dead… and committing suicide because you never got the letter… and stabbing yourself in the chest.

Eugh. Imagine how different this film would have been if Disney followed Shakespeare's version.

When Home Improvement Kid's daughter is born to be the next heir to the kingdom, she wanders off into a forbidden area despite her parents' warnings… and literally stumbles across Scar's long-forgotten heir, Kovu.  
Who was never addressed once in the first movie.  
(_"My name's Kovu."_)

When these two future lovers meet, their families will confront each other… and continue to argue about past plot points from the first movie.  
(_"Who killed Scar?" "Simba!"_)

And where they'll come face-to-face with the movie's ultimate villainess, Zira.  
A psychotic, Scar-obsessed fan girl that is more in love with him… than said megalomaniac was with himself in the first film.  
(_"THESE LANDS BELONG TO SCAR!")  
("You have the same conniving mind that made Scar so powerful.")_

Did we mention that she likes Scar?

_("Scaaar is gone…!  
But Zira's still around!")_

A lot.

_("You've betrayed your pride… betrayed SCAR!")  
("This is for you… Scar!"_)

Eeeugh... I'm pretty sure the guy would have filled out a restraining order against this chick.

For an hour and ten minutes, watch Simba develop an inexplicable paranoia around anyone—and everything—that has ever associated with his uncle, ever.  
_("I humbly ask to join your pride." "NO."_)

…And watch him turn into a prideful king, who later reveals that he had banished a former Pride Lander into the wilderness… where they had ultimately converted to a bug-related diet… and then returned to the Pride Lands… to follow in their deceased loved one's footsteps… and duke it out with the king in a huge, climactic fight… which ultimately results in the villain falling off of a cliff.

Wait a minute… _didn't this happen before?_ (Flashback to whole movie of _The Lion King_).

DON'T be filled in… as Disney doesn't disclose important plot points… that would actually really benefit the audience.

_Wait, so Kovu isn't Scar's son? And if he's not Scar's son, then why would Zira give birth some other guy's kid if she's so devoted to Scar? Were Scar and Zira ever together? Why wasn't Scar's heir ever mentioned in the first film? Are Zira's two other kids even related Scar? And if so, wouldn't that make them part of the royal bloodline? If something were to happen to Simba and Kiara, wouldn't they be the new king and queen?_

Ghuh, I need an aspirin.

…And watch Disney struggle to overcome new challenges… LIKE… finding a new way to say that we're all connected in the great Circle of Life…

(_"We are one."_)

…Make as many _Lion King_ references as it can before it really starts to get old.

(_"My father says to never turn your back on an Outsider!" *Cue Nala pinning Simba* *Cue Rafiki holding Kiara over ledge* "YOU'VE KILLED YOUR OWN BROTHER!" "You can't turn your back on them." *Cue Kiara dangling on a cliff* *Cue Zira and Kiara falling off of a cliff*)_

Seriously. We're not confusing this movie for something else.

…And avoiding incest complications with its two main characters.

(…)

Guess somebody should tell Disney that Kiara made out with Simba's uncle in the movie, "_Last Call_."

STARRING…!

_Overprotective Father_ (Simba)

_Slightly Less-Annoying Girlfriend_ (Nala)

_Juliet Incompetent_ (Kiara)

_Emo Max Goof_ (Kovu)

_Mommy Dearest_ (Zira)

_Fleabag_ (Nuka)

_Gretchen_ _Wieners_ (Vitani)

_The Insomniacs_ (The Outsiders)

_Just the Comic Relief_ (Timon & Pumbaa)

_Bird Alfred Pennyworth_ (Zazu)

And_ the Matchmaker_ (Rafiki)

The Lion King II: Simba's Pride.

Man, if you think your family tree is confusing, just wait until you see this one.

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Thanks for watching! And be sure to Subscribe to hear other things in my awesome trailer voice!  
Another attempt at an Honest Trailer. No offense to any _Lion King_ fans, of course. This was all in good fun. I will try to see if I can do _The Lion King 1 __1/2_ soon.  
That movie is _way_ overdue to be made fun of. Please Review! :)


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